Annual Staff Appreciation Breakfast
On June 28th Family Paths' Executive Director, Program Managers, and Directors got up extra early to prepare a warm breakfast served with lots of gratitude for staff and interns at Family Paths. This annual breakfast was so nourishing in many ways.
At the breakfast, we said good bye to the fantastic interns in the TIPS program, who have completed their service year. Suzanne Lapidus, Consultation Specialist in TIPS, is also leaving the agency after 6 years. Suzanne shared with a beautiful smile, "I've never felt so supported in a job before as much as at Family Paths." Also leaving is Margarita Prensa, Mental Health Treatment Specialist, in our ECMH program, having worked 15 months at the agency. Best of luck to all in your new Paths.
The appreciation continued with staff anniversaries. Nancy Morosohk, Counseling program manager has been with us for 10 years. Lyda Mata, Chief Financial Officer for 5 years, and Rosa Giron, a child care worker for our Parent Education program, has been with us for 10 years. The agency also enthusiastically welcomed with applause new staff. Kimberly Porter will be the new FIT Program Manager in Hayward and Lisa Koumrian will be joining our Oakland Facilities department.
To wrap up the morning, Kaye Anderson, a licensed clinical social worker and certified hoop-dance teacher, came by with an armful of hula hoops and showed us the joy and power of the hoop. Thank you to ECMH Program Manager Dr. Jill Sulka for bringing Kaye and her hoop power to the breakfast!
For more information, you can visit Kaye's website at www.hoop-power.com. If you purchase Kaye's handmade hula hoops, she will donate 10% of the proceeds to Family Paths; make sure to identify yourself from Family Paths if you do order one.
Thank you to Family Paths' Management Team for the breakfast event!
Keep on hula hooping.
Vote for Liora B!
Help Family Paths win $2,500 to support our mental health and family support programming!
Family Paths recently teamed up with Jodi Schumate, a local Mary Kay consultant, to give busy mom and Family Paths' Treatment Specialist Liora Brosbe a custom makeover.
Mary Kay is currently holding a makeover contest called Get Beautiful. Give Back. If Liora wins, she will receive $2,500 to spend as she wishes. If she wins, Family Paths will also receive $2,500 in support of our programming for Alameda County families.
Go to https://www.mkmakeovercontest.com/US/EN/Gallery/ and search for Liora B. to see Liora's before/after photos, and to read what she would do to change the world if money, time, and talent were all unlimited.
And please vote for her! Each person can place up to 5 votes per day, and we will appreciate all the help we can get until June 25, when the voting period is over.
From all of us at Family Paths, thank you so much for being part of our community of supporters. We hope everyone is enjoying their summer!
What makes a good foster parent?
"An ideal foster family is open and willing to learn," says Gloria Riley, Family Paths' Foster Parent Community Advocate.
Gloria would know. She estimates that she has brought approximately fifty foster children into her own home in the last 20 years, and she smiles with a soft kind of pride at the positive differences, both big and small, that she has been able to make in the lives of those children. "It's a lot of work to be a foster parent, but it's really rewarding to see a child grow up," she says.
There are a variety of reasons that people choose to be foster parents. "Some do it if they can't have kids, or because they want to help out a child or children, or they wish to add to their family," explains Gloria. "Which is great, because the need for foster parents is definitely there. There is a definite need for homes for foster kids in Alameda County, particularly homes with the capacity to support children that are medically fragile, with special needs, as well as with medical and psychological needs. Supportive homes are also needed for young people who identify as LGBTQ."
Potential foster parents go through a training process and an orientation in order to acquire the proper license and be the best foster parent possible. Once you are a foster parent, there is a strong support system in place, including the Foster Parent Association, as well as agencies like Family Paths, which provides anonymous parenting support through the 24 Hour Parent Support Hotline, as well as more in-depth therapeutic support when necessary. If you are interested in becoming a foster parent in Alameda County, you may call Alameda County Social Services to inquire.
Thanks for a fantastic event!
The Friends of Family Paths would like to thank everyone who came out to Family Paths' fundraising event on Saturday April 30th. We had a big group of friends and supporters present to support the work of Family Paths, and we were able to raise over $10,000 in support of our work building stronger families in Alameda County.
We want to send a huge, enthusiastic thanks to our event sponsors, Wells Fargo Bank, Scott Valley Bank, and ISU Insurance Services of San Francisco. Thanks also go out to all of our amazingly generous silent auction donors, who donated some really awesome items and services. Thanks also to Stage Left Cellars for opening up their beautiful space to us, and to Coppertop Ovens for the fresh, delicious pizzas.
"This was our 2nd annual event, and we're really excited to keep building the momentum," says Tara Bartholomew, Development Director for Family Paths. "Each year, we see some new faces at this event, and we're so glad to be building our network of support in such a fun setting."
Karen Truong of the Friends of Family Paths says, "What an incredible turnout! I'm impressed by the amount of support we received from sponsors, donors, staff, and attendees. A special THANK YOU goes out to every member of the Friends of Family Paths for their vision, dedication, and hard work in the months leading up to and during this unforgettable event."
We are so thankful for our family of supporters, and for the opportunity to hold this event each year. Together, we are making real progress toward our vision of a safe home for every child.
Annual Wine Tasting Event & Silent Auction April 30th!
On April 30th, The Friends of Family Paths will host an evening of wine tasting, complete with delicious appetizers, an amazing silent auction, and lots of our favorite people! The event is at Stage Left Cellars, a winery that produces limited batches of fine wines from grapes sourced in California and Oregon. The silent auction is going to be truly special. We have had so many amazing local businesses donate items, certificates, and services, and we’re so excited to give everyone the chance to win some really fun (and some practical!) things, like sailboat cruises around the bay, music and dancing lessons, works from local artists, and free oil changes! Basically, it’s going to be great. And we really want you there. Get your tickets here: http://www.eventsbot.com/events/eb932652212
What we're reading
At Family Paths, we recently set up our own comprehensive library of books on a variety of topics pertinent to child development, family dynamics, cultural competency, and other mental health related topics. Our "library" is available to all Family Paths staff, and we've really been enjoying having so many great resources in one convenient place!
One great book on our shelves is Raising Your Spirited Child, by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. This book was first printed in 1991, and was most recently released as a Harper paperback in 2006. Raising Your Spirited Child is a great guide for parents whose child is especially intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent, and/or energetic. The book offers insightful quizzes that can help parents better understand the nuances of their child's personality, and wise, gentle suggestions on everyday parenting dilemmas like bedtime and mealtime. For example, she suggests that at mealtime the more "intense" child may need to be taught good manners, the "persistent" child may need to be involved in food preparation, and the "sensitive" child may need to be served a variety of foods.
If you have an especially spirited child, or know someone who does, this national bestseller might be helpful. Happy reading!
Announcing Family Paths' 2nd Annual Fundraiser!
We had such a great time at last year's fundraiser, and we are so excited to do it again! We are going to be tasting some great wines from Stage Left Cellars, eating appetizers, and bidding on some truly awesome silent auction items.
Save the date of April 30th, and buy your tickets today via this link!
http://eventsbot.com/events/eb932652212
Our commitment to cultural competency
On February 11th, Family Paths clinicians were led in a powerful training offered by Taqueila Washington of EmpowerMe! Services. The topic of this 5 ½ hour training was "Working with African-American Youth and their Families," and it encompassed a variety of issues that directly affect many African-Americans. Topics up for discussion included the slave trade's creation of a legacy of multi-generational trauma, the inner-city experience, and the link between poverty and issues surrounding diet and nutrition.
As Family Paths strives to be a local leader in culturally competent mental health and family support programming, we know that the importance of trainings like this one cannot be overestimated. Expert-led trainings guide clinicians in the self-examination processes that are so vital to providing the highest-quality treatment to a diverse clientele.
Sam Markewich, our Clinical Training Coordinator, says, "Family Paths clinicians will benefit from this because they now have a culturally sensitive and depthful knowledge base and tool box to help them best get to know, understand, and help African-American youth, parents, and other family members in order to help them to thrive."
EmpowerMe! Services offers educational workshops and trainings on a variety of different topics, including Cross Cultural Counseling and the Family, Culturally Inclusive Therapy, The Undocumented Experience, Self Care for Service Providers, Teen Dating Violence, and Working with "at risk" youth. Learn more about Taquelia Washington and EmpowerMe! Services here.
Rigging Kids' Brains for Happy Memories
By putting neuroscience into action, we can help our children experience-and remember-more good times than bad.
Life is full of difficulties. But Neuroscientist Rick Hanson explains in his fabulous book on "the practical neuroscience of happiness, love, & wisdom," that we can take positive steps to determine which memories stick with our kids. Hanson argues that the key isn't to avoid the pain that life presents-it's through our challenges that we learn deep lessons we couldn't learn any other way. Instead we can foster positive experiences that offset those challenges.
Unfortunately, we are a bit hard-wired to mostly remember bad things while forgetting the good ones. According to Hanson, our mind acts "like Teflon for positive" memories and "Velcro for negative ones." This is not good for our happiness: If most of our memories are negative, we come to perceive the world as depressing, even threatening.
Fortunately, Hanson gives us a method for raising kids who have more positive memories than negative ones, kids who have happy associations with their childhood and whose outlook on life reflects that. Here's how to "Take in the Good," as Hanson calls it.
Teach kids to notice the good things that are all around them. Practice actively looking for the positive: Those flowers we planted in the fall are blooming; our neighbor was so nice to help us with a difficult project; school was particularly fun today. Regular gratitude practices help with this. The key, according to Hanson, is to "turn positive facts into positive experiences."
Draw out-really savor-those positive experiences. This aspect will forever change the way my kids and I do our "3 good things" practice at bedtime. The idea is not just to hold something positive in our awareness for as long as possible, but also to remember the positive emotions that go along with them. Now my kids list something that is good about their day, like that they had fun with their friends, and we really think about how good it felt to be playing and enjoying friendship. This evokes what was rewarding about a "good thing," and helps use our brain chemistry to strengthen connections associated with the memory.
Let it all sink in. Have your kids imagine that the good thing you were just talking about "is entering deeply into [their] mind and body, like the sun's warmth into a T-shirt, water into a sponge, or a jewel placed in a treasure chest in your heart."
Adapted from "Rigging Kids' Brains for Happy Memories" by Christine Carter in her blog "Raising Happiness: Science for Joyful Kids and Happier Parents." The Greater Good Science Center in Berkeley, CA.
You can find the blog here.
Talking to Your Preschooler about Nontraditional Families
If your family is nontraditional, you're in good company. These days, many kids live in single-parent, blended, adoptive, or gay- and lesbian-parent families. Two- and 3-year-olds aren't likely to ask any questions about their family or anyone else's but simply accept the way things are. They'll tend to assume that all families are just like theirs.
But once these little kids come into daily contact with other preschoolers - kids who also love to talk about their families - they begin to notice that not all families look the same. At this point, you can expect the questions to start.
Whatever your own family is like, don't shy away from these discussions; they'll help your preschooler better understand the world and her place in it. The messages to focus on are that families come in all shapes and sizes, that your child is loved, and that no one type of family is better than another. Here are some tips to use when talking to your preschooler about nontraditional families:
Introduce the topic casually. Strike up a conversation about families at the dinner table or while driving in the car. Use children's books, TV shows, or real families you know to spark discussion. "All parents should talk about the fact that there are different types of families," says Arlene Lev, a family therapist and author of The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide. That includes families with a mommy, ones with two daddies or just a grandma, those with lots of kids, and so on.
Know when to leave it alone. There's no need to chat about family issues every day or for long periods; take your cues from your child. After telling her daughter Mae about her biological father, Single Mom Seeking: Playdates, Blind Dates, and Other Dispatches from the Dating World author Rachel Sarah sometimes pulled out photos of him or offered to point out where he lives on a map. But often Mae wasn't interested. "She'd already moved on to something else," says Sarah.
Let kids explore roles. A young child from a nontraditional family might create a make-believe daddy or mommy. Don't freak out or assume it means he needs therapy. It's a part of imaginary play and should fade with time. Lev, a lesbian mom, recalls when her son watched a father tossing his child into the air, then turned to her and asked for a dad. "I said, 'Are you saying that because you'd like to have a dad who would toss you in the air?'" When her son said yes, she suggested "borrowing" a friend's dad. "A lot of times we assume there's a deep psychological process going on when really at this age it's about something so much simpler," she notes.
Be positive. If a preschooler has a playdate and returns talking glowingly about a family situation he doesn't have - one with a dad, a mom, or lots of siblings - take it in stride. If you get upset or defensive, your child will pick up on it. Just say, "It sounds like Will has lots of fun with his daddy," or "I bet that's a lot of fun."
Excerpted from "How to Talk to Your Child About Nontraditional Family Types" by Ziba Kashef on Babycenter.com. Read the full article here.
LGBTQ Foster Youth Training! June is LGBTQ Month!
In supporting our goal of continuously cultivating a multiculturally competent agency, Family Paths staff recently attended a training session on the issues surrounding LGBTQ foster youth. The training took place at the California Endowment on June 1st, and was presented by the Y.O.U.T.H. Training Project, a dynamic multi-year collaboration between current and former foster youth, social work professionals, social work training academies, foundations and others committed to the empowerment and futures of California foster youth. This dynamic and informative training focused on the ways in which clinicians can be allies to, advocate for and better meet the needs of LGBTQ youth in the foster care system.
Foster LGBTQ youth often face difficulties that surpass those of straight foster youth, and clinicians and therapists often hold a crucial role in the lives of these youth at the very times that they are in the process of self-acceptance and/or coming out. This is why it is important that clinicians be trained about the important intricacies of their role in the lives of LGBTQ foster youth. This training, led by former foster youth who identify as LGBTQ and as Allies, was extremely helpful supporting clinicians' work by providing a space in which to think creatively about best practices, various ways one can be an LGBTQ Ally, and ways to best advocate for this particular population. "I was so excited to be able to hear from former foster youth themselves," said Barbra Silver, Clinical Director at Family Paths.
You can learn more about the Y.O.U.T.H. Training Project here.
How to be a Happy Mom
If you are thinking of buying the mother in your life gobs of stuff this Mother's Day, consider this: stuff won't make her lastingly happy, but there are other things that you can do that can. And if you are a mother, consider taking the matter into your own hands rather than waiting for a present to make your Mother's Day a good one. Here are some things you can do to that are more likely to bring you real joy:
1. Go out with your friends and have a few laughs.
The most persistent finding we have from 50 years happiness research tells us that our well-being is best predicted by how connected we feel to other people. Do we have lots of friends? Know our neighbors? Are we close to our extended family? Care about our co-workers? People with a lot of social connections are less likely to experience sadness, loneliness, low self-esteem, and problems with eating and sleeping.
So to bring on some lasting happiness, we need to nurture our social connections. But a girls' night out can bring us instant happiness as well, and I'm not talking about the kind you imbibe. The laughter we share with our buddies literally changes our body chemistry by retarding that pesky fight-or-flight stress system. A good guffaw-or even little giggle-causes our heart rate and blood pressure to drop and our muscles to relax.
2. Have your kids or partner give you a massage or pedicure.
There really is such thing as a magic touch. Like laughter, being touched in a positive way can also trigger biochemical reactions that make us feel good. Getting a massage or being touched-even just briefly-by a loved one can increase activation in the orbitofrontal cortex, the part of the brain where we feel the pleasure in a reward, as when we eat a piece of chocolate or win a pile of money. It also reduces the cardiovascular stress response and decreases our levels of stress hormones like cortisol. Touch is essential to our physical and mental well-being-without it we wither and perish.
3. Take some quiet time for yourself.
The appeal of spa time doesn't just come from the positive effects of touch-it comes from the possibility of some quiet time for reflection or meditation. Want to turn your brainwaves that signal stress into those that indicate bliss? Start meditating. Do it enough and research suggests that you will increase activity in the area of your brain that is active when you feel happiness (the left prefrontal cortex).
Neuroscience of yester yore held that our brains were pretty much done growing when we reached full height. Now we know that our brain is more like a muscle-use a particular area a lot and it will grow. As science writer Sharon Begley describes in her book Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain, studies of Tibetan monks show that meditation is a particularly effective way to grow the part of your brain that registers positive emotions. We Westerners freely accept that if we want to excel at something like music, or athletics, or learning a new language, we will need to train and practice hard. However, we rarely think that we can also train and practice to be happier-something Buddhists have long known. Meditation is concentrated happiness training. If you don't know how to meditate but are interested in learning, Martha Beck outlines a whole chapter of different techniques in her book The Joy Diet.
If you just read that part on meditation and thought, "Huh. I'm sticking to the pedicure," don't give up on taking some quiet time altogether. Take some time to yourself to begin a gratitude journal. Writing about things you feel grateful for is a simple way to bring more joy into your life. People who "practice gratitude" feel considerably happier (25%) than those in a control group-they are more joyful, enthusiastic, interested, and determined. In one study, researchers had people list five things they felt thankful for once a week for 10 weeks. At the end of the study, participants "felt better about their lives as a whole and were more optimistic about the future."
***
These benefits are all the evidence you need to have a guilt-free pass to nurture your own happiness-whether it is by meditating or practicing gratitude, spending a little more time with your friends, or by indulging yourself with the nurturing touch of another person. Do these things this year in celebration of Mother's Day with the intention that they will become a regular part of your activities. For the sake of your kids.
From "How to be a Happy Mom" by Christine Carter, Ph.D., mother of two and Executive Director of the Greater Good Science Center.
Family Paths Program Spotlight: Early Childhood Mental Health Consultation
Family Paths' Early Childhood Mental Health Consultation is a program through which three Family Paths staff members work as consultants in our community. As member of the TIPS team, Suzanne Lapidus, April Netzer and Mari Barnes are consulting with preschool teachers, directors and childcare providers in various school district, Had Start and private childcare settings. Consultants help early childcare staff identify, understand and manage social, emotional and behavioral issues that arise in the early care setting. This team knows that early intervention is an important step in treating and resolving these behavioral issues.
Family Paths has been providing early childhood consultation for over six years. Some of the most important characteristics of this program are its relationship-based model and its focus on collaboration between consultant and teacher/childcare provider. Family Paths consultants work to become part of the childcare team by building trusting relationships with staff. "Through genuine respect and curiosity, flexibility and openness and a willingness to see everyone's perspectives, consultants can help to transform relationships, leading to a richer experience for young children in their childcare setting" says Nancy Morosohk, LCSW, who supervises the consultation program. Enriching young children's childcare experience is definitely an investment in our future.
Thank You!
Family Paths, together with the Friends of Family Paths, wants to send a big thanks to everyone who came to Periscope Cellars on April 24th for our first annual Blue Ribbon Fundraising Event in honor of National Child Abuse Prevention Month! This event raised $8,000 to help build stronger families in the Bay Area.
The Friends of Family Paths worked hard to put on a successful event, and we were thrilled to see so many familiar faces. It was also exciting to meet a number of new friends and supporters of the work that we do to treat and prevent child abuse and build stronger families.
At the event, we unveiled our new promotional video, and a former client spoke about the services that Family Paths provided to help her through difficult times for her family.
We want to send out a big thanks to our generous community partners who donated goods and services to our silent auction! It was very successful, with a variety of items: from delicious cakes to art materials to spa services and excellent bottles of wine!
Our thanks go out, too, to the folks at Periscope Cellars in Emeryville. Their excellent selection of wines and their hospitality were much appreciated by all throughout the event.
Thanks, everyone, for a fun evening honoring the treatment and prevention of child abuse. Together, we can build stronger families in our community.
April is Child Abuse Prevention Month.
Barack Obama has declared April to be Child Abuse Prevention Month. You can read about the five protective factors that help safeguard families against abuse, in addition to the ways that Family Paths helps to prevent child abuse in our April newsletter.
Also, the Friends of Family Paths is hosting an event in honor of Child Abuse Prevention Month! Join us at Periscope Cellars on April 24th for appetizers, music, wine-tasting, and an extensive silent auction! All this and more in this month's newsletter.
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Friends of Family Paths’ April 24th Event
The recently created group, Friends of Family Paths, is a group of female professionals dedicated to supporting the mission and work of Family Paths through philanthropic activities. They are debuting their fabulous group with a very special evening of appetizers, entertainment and tasting local wines in honor of April, National Child Abuse Prevention Month. And, best of all, you’re invited!
This event, slated for April 24, is going to be a terrific evening at Periscope Cellars, an urban winery in the heart of the East Bay. We plan on raising awareness both of the importance of preventing child abuse and, of course, about the work that Family Paths does to treat the effects of child abuse and prevent its recurrence. One of the highlights of the evening will surely be the silent auction, for which we already have some exciting items! We are so thankful to the local businesses that have already pledged their support by donating some truly top-notch products and services. We are still looking for donations! Call Jessica Wright at (510) 893-9230 ext. 286 if you would like to donate a product or service for our silent auction.
We are selling tickets here. We truly hope to see all of you—our community of friends, colleagues and supporters—at Periscope Cellars on April 24th!
Strong Collaboration within our Community
Family Paths maintains strong relationships with several other community-based organizations in Alameda County. Our clinicians work hard to collaborate with other organizations when clients could benefit from services that Family Paths does not directly provide.
Family Paths holds regular Grand Rounds-style meetings, during which therapists share with and learn from one another. At a recent Grand Rounds meeting, a Family Paths clinician, in conjunction with Assessment Specialists from WestCoast Children’s Clinic, shared a success story with her colleagues regarding an instance of collaboration between the two agencies.
What was especially striking in this particular case study was the way that the client’s entire family shared the traumatic experiences of the past as well as the process that helps them to heal and move forward. It was a great reminder that at the core of the work that we do at Family Paths is our commitment to build stronger families. To those ends, we utilize all available resources in our communities, and enjoy building strong working relationships with organizations who share our values. Thanks to WestCoast Children’s Clinic for sharing with us their well-rounded, collaborative evaluation process!
February News
Lots has already been going on for Family Paths in the new year. Read about our Internship Program, including an Intern Spotlight on Erin Hill, Our LGBT trainings, and our wine tasting event for child abuse prevention month in April!
Find the whole newsletter here